Ever own a dairy goat? No? Yes? 

Those who said “no” but secretly wish for one have a dreamy, far-away look as they imagine a peaceful pasture full of demure well-behaved caprine beings.

Those who said “yes,” as in past tense, “had,” never again, will have a slight head twitch and a crazed look when you mention the words “Dairy Goat.”

And those brave souls who still have dairy goats and have had them longer than a year or two are most definitely a special breed in themselves!

I, myself, fall into the “special breed” category. Dairy goats were on my list of homestead animals when I first began homesteading but not quite at the top of my list. But I really wanted what they had – MILK! Dairy goats are much smaller than dairy cows; therefore, I assumed, much more manageable and cost-effective.

I figured the goats would be easy to feed because a goat will eat anything, right?

Once, I had a doe, a week or two from delivering twins, escape from her pen (shocking, I know!) and munched on a few of my azalea bushes that adorned the front of my farmhouse. She was dead by the next day, along with her babies.

Yes, goats will eat just about everything, but they shouldn’t.

Anyone ever have a 2–3-year-old in the house for a while? Dairy goats are perpetual toddlers. I’m serious. They throw tantrums. And then the next moment, those goats are all cute and cuddly...only to turn around and butt you in the backend!

Dairy goats watch your every move. They watch the windows in your home, and with a single, split-second view of you, they start yelling incessantly until the hay rack and grain bucket are filled. I’ve literally had goats that sounded like they were yelling, MA! MA! MAAAAAAA!

Thank goodness it’s legal to walk away from them and shut the door.

My absolute favorite time with my goats was in the early coolness of morning. I’d lean my head gently into the side of their warm body as I milked. With steam rising off the froth of milk, I smiled, realizing I was living my nostalgic dreams...and then I was rudely brought back to reality with a crash and warm milk running down my leg. This 4-legged creature was pissed because her grain bucket was empty, so she kicked the bucket!

What is it about dairy goats that lure us into their entrapment? SPRING

Those bouncy, flouncy baby goats with kissable, lovable faces who will cuddle in your arms—they are trickery! They provide the playful antics of jumping and spinning, causing much laughter. Those tiny creatures will cause farm amnesia! And we will forget. We will forget those adorable babies will grow up to be toddlers!

In my earliest years with goats, a mentor told me, “If you can keep a goat alive, you can keep any animal alive.” I should have heeded those words, but no. I fell in love with these beautiful animals and learned to laugh instead of cry.